Burdened

I can't believe Christmas is a week away. This has been the fastest Christmas season ever. Life has been super busy with work, Christmas parties, Christmas shopping/creating, and just life. My friend Erin came last week for 5 days, which was so fun, and my friend Kim and her mom are coming tomorrow. I can't say "no one ever comes to visit me" being that I feel like I pretty much I have a revolving door. I am ok with that most of the time. As much fun stuff as I have been doing I just have not felt like blogging. In a weird way I haven't felt like I have had much to say. As fun and exciting as the Christmas season is, I have felt more burdened this season. I feel like I should be the opposite of burdened since this is the season we focus so much on the birth of Christ. And the birth of Christ brought the death the of Christ which brought freedom for me. I shouldn't carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. That is what Christ is for. He says to lay our burdens at his feet. He wants to carry them. He is in control. I wish I always believed that. I have felt really burdened about a lot. I have a lot of friends who are hurting right now. I am hurting right now. Hurting with broken hearts, hurting with broken relationships, hurting with family illnesses and deaths, hurting from past sin, hurting from the loss of a job, hurting over personal struggles. I hurt for them. And then just walking around New York I have constantly faced with hurting people. People who look like they are carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders, people who are hungry and homeless, people who on the outside look extremely successful, but run to pleasures of the world to fill their empty hearts. Sometimes it just seems unfair to me that some people just seem to have really easy lives where everything goes there way and some people just have one hard thing after another. I don't get it. I know God is sovereign. I believe that, but the pain is still there. The pain is still there for my friends and the pain is still there for me. I have thought about Heaven a lot lately. What is it going to be like? What will it be like to have not more brokenness, no more hunger, no more pain. One of my favorite passages in the bible is Revelation 7:16-17. The last part of 17 says, "and He will guide them to springs of living water, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes." I love the picture of God doing that, of there being no more tears because there will be no more sadness. As much as I want the opportunity to be a wife and a mother and want to experience so much more of life I have often longed for heaven and for that day of bowing at the feet of Jesus. This world really is temporary and it feels that way to me more and more.

So in some ways this Christmas season I am more thankful for the birth of Jesus than ever, because I know that he was born in that manger so that he could die. He could die for me. He could die for my friends and family. As I meditate on the birth of Jesus this Christmas I want to let go of the burdens and fight to hand them to my savior.

"You will find a baby wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.

Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!"

Luke 2:13-14