On Prayer

At the beginning of May I wrote this post.  I decided for the month of May to discipline myself to spend extended time in prayer everyday.  I made a prayer plan and prayed a lot.  Some days it was hard and somedays it was really great. If I could summarize what the Lord taught me in this month it would be to pray continually. To not give up in prayer. I know prayer is important, but I often forget that the Lord uses our prayers.  I struggle so much at times with fear of praying the wrong thing, fear that my prayers are just bouncing off the ceiling, fear that God is tired of hearing my requests.  I think specifically lately I have struggled with weariness.  I often feel like I am praying the same things for others and myself and God is just not answering.  I know that is not true, because I see him at work all around, but in the midst of brokeness around me it can often feel that way.  I decided to go through a book on prayer during May.  I feel like I gained a lot from this book, but one quote from George Mueller has really stuck with me, "The great point is to never give up until the answer comes. I have been praying for fitfty-two years every day for two men, sons of friends of my youth. They are not converted yet, but they will be!...The great fault of children of God is, they do not continue in prayer, they do not go on praying, they do not persevere. If they desire anything for God's glory, they should pray until they get it."  


Persevering in prayer is difficult.  I have to continually remind myself that as a child of God he is the one who rules my heart.  He places things on my heart for a reason and I need to continually take them to his throne.  I want to be like Hannah who prays in rawness, she prays earnestly and with much passion.  But when she left the temple of the Lord she left in peace. She left in faith.  She laid her requests before the throne and knew that she had been heard.  I long to be like Hannah.  I long to have so much faith in the Lord that I am praising him for my answer before I even pray.  As much as I want to be like Hannah, I often feel much more like the father who cried out before Jesus, "I believe; help my unbelief" I feel like I am always praying that I would trust the Lord.  That I would believe in his promises.  That I would believe that all things are possible for those who believe.

I often think about Elijah and what it must have been like to pray so earnestly for so long, and to not give up until it was answered.  I know there are many others in the bible who prayed and waited, but waiting is hard.  I am continually overwhelmed by the brokeness of the world, by the hurt of people around me, and the great need of the Lord to intervene.  I know deep down that God is perfectly in control of the world.  That he is ruling the world from his throne in Heaven and there is nothing that can go unnoticed by Him. I know He is a good God and longs for his chilren to pray to him.  I know that He doesn't get tired of me and he wants me to pray continually.

I am continuing to learn the importance of prayer. I often don't know what else to do but to pray.  So that is what I do.  I pray.  I pray my joys, I pray my fears, I pray my tears, I pray for others, I pray with others, I pray in weariness. I pray when I really just want to give up. I pray because God calls us to pray. John Piper says to pray until the mountain has moved.  I want to do that.  I want the Lord to give me the faith to pray continually.  It is a priviledge to pray.  It is a priviledge to be a part of the Lord's work and to see him answer our prayers. I am thankful to have the opportunity to go before the throne of God and to worship him by praying to him.

"To believe that the Lord will hear my prayer honors his truthfulness, His power, His love and generousity, His wisdom. If you wish to dishonor every attribute of God, pray with unbelief. But if you want to put a crown on the head of HIm who has saved you believe that if you ask He will give" C.H. Spurgeon."